Archive for the ‘Isk’ Category

fasteeth

Posted: August 18, 2011 in Isk

so its ramadhan… time for us muslims to fast. i cant deny the fact that its pretty tough to upkeep the fresh breath when one fasts.

i had friends who uses breath spray… i’d avoid that to confuse the confused. my toothpaste is running low… HELP!!! oh… for me, i will brush my teeth twice during office hours. once before lunch… and then about 4pm. ya know, just to keep em fresh.

brush your freakin teeth!!

at this moment, i also do think about those PRCs who … ok let’s just say toothpaste in singapore might be expensive…. BUT THATS NOT A REASON FOR YOU TO BRUSH YOUR TEETH ONCE A WEEK!!!

 

 

 

ingreed ient

Posted: July 5, 2011 in Food, lessons in life
Tags: ,

learning to cook

not really my way but… yeah… sometimes it happens.

to spit and lick back...

as per the topic, do you mind licking back the saliva (perhaps with some of the green gooey mucus from your tonsils) which you have already spit, back to your taste buds? gross sounding doesn’t it? unacceptable? of course.

well this scenario can also be applied in walks of life. For example;

you bought a phone to replace your old phone. you brag at how your new phone is better than the old one. along the way, you somehow fall apart with your new phone cos your old phone works better and have all the things you need. do you (lick) use back your old phone which you just (spit) dumped?

In similar cases, this scenario can be used for; pets, boyfriends, JOBs, friends, gadgets, JOBs, toys, girlfriends, JOBs, clothes, vehicles, shoes, JOBs … and the list goes on. good thing blood ties doesn’t imply here. or maybe it does…

well, stop wondering to why i blog about this. an interesting story just creeped up my thoughts. thats all. no i’m not venting my anger or whatsoever.

bottomline, my point is, don’t talk so much about the things you left, dispose, dump or throw. you never know when you’ll be needing them….. again.

fear allah

Posted: January 21, 2011 in family, lessons in life

i was touched by what i overheard my brother talking to his 3 years old son when the boy was trembling in fear of cockroaches lurking near the chalet where i had my birthday party.

“ryan, what did ayah tell u? only scared of Allah (swt). dont be scared of anything else” young ryan then braved himself (though still trembling) and walked past the area where he saw the cockroach earlier on. took a peek back to the area.. and continued to play.

im proud of how he instilled that sort of courage to his son.

sex object

Posted: January 18, 2011 in just for laughs

“My wife is a sex object. Everytime I ask for sex, she objects!” – Les Dawson

the sleeping beauty

Posted: November 20, 2010 in rants & ramblings
Tags: ,

they said, a woman’s beauty lies when she’s asleep. whoever they are… i do believe in that bit.

 

my sleeping beauty

FB

Posted: November 4, 2010 in just for laughs
Tags: ,

wife has been farting a lot lately… she told me this morning that she had a fart bubble. so i reckon this cartoon has the best description of what a fart bubble is…

where silence is not golden

it’ll pinch you. it’ll bite you. it’ll inject all the molecules of sorrow. it’ll penetrate deep through your pores into your marrows.

your throat runs dry. tears will flow. your head feels heavy. your heart stops to glow.

you’ll try to put sense in your ego. you’ll continuously fail. for knowing it all will just derail…

there’ll be no laughter, there’ll be no joy… it’s as good as you lost the boy.

where silence is not golden

gravity sucks

Posted: October 25, 2010 in just for laughs
Tags:

admit it. its funny.

hazey wazey

Posted: October 25, 2010 in rants & ramblings

PSI index as of noon today is 37. compared to the likes of 90s the past few days. i think the rain helped a lot.

screw you people who taunt the sumatra burnings. its their archipelago which helped us from facing natural disasters. (macam paham)

the long awaited ‘numero eighto’ came and go.

a whole new wind of change, would be how i’d describe it. not gonna touch on some idiocracy decisions by the men with appointments… but we all know, this is somehow ‘expected’ when you are in green. it automatically makes one stupid, dirty, lazy … and the list goes on.

yang pertama dan utama.... ??!

the guys (commanders included) who were ‘fighting fit’ couldnt care much for what’s going on. the guys who were ‘unfit’ were fitter at administrative, or rather “own time own target” roles.

its the best time to hang around old friends talking about the ‘glory days’ and to catch up on whats going on with each other lives. Revelations of some dudes just became interesting….

From sad stories of broken marriages to happy stories of making it big. all walks of life… all sorts of dramas.

And usual questions i have to deal with everytime… Eeeeeuuurrrkkkhhhhh.

all in all, its a good waste of time.

barney farney

Posted: September 15, 2010 in just for laughs, lyrics
Tags: , ,

damn purple thing

I love you.
You love me.
Barney gave me HIV.
It started with a hug. And ended on the floor.
I was raped by a dinosaur.

its hari raya. everyone wants to look nice. some just wanna look different.

the first few days of going to relative’s place, this one thing i noticed on people’s roving eyes. though i cant confirm what exactly is on their mind (especially ladies), one can easily tell that they were checking out each other’s outfit. the guys will have a lesser evil look on them.

to me, its a huge “SO WHAT??!!” be it exclusive ( i hate this term), be it plain or fancy, be it new or past year’s, be it nice looking or eyesore.. its a piece of traditional clothing which one probably put on only during festive season or people’s wedding for god’s sake. Honestly, it doesnt mean anything much to me. And yes, if we were to follow some believes or practise, we were to get new set of clothings. but for practicality’s sake, that statement sucks!

of being different

wife and i were with bert and family at geylang on a few occasions to get hari raya stuffs. you see some spend their hearts (and wallets) out for this joyous occasion. i always tell myself that i hope these people wont spend beyond their ‘affordability’.  lets take the carpets for instance. their sale of carpets there were insane. every year, there will be people buying carpets. if those were the same people, and they were buying carpets every ‘effing’ year, does this mean they have 10 carpets over 10 years of hari raya?!

true, its not my problem. thus, me making noise to myself and my imaginary friends.

"you pay for it!" ...

i believe, if only people celebrate hari raya with much practicality, the other avenues could be channeled for the needy. those orphans… those elderlies at ‘homes’. they probably deserved better.

always had this argument with a friend ages ago…. he would spend with all his might to get this festive period ‘perfect’. he would spend on the expensive stuffs just for this one month of hari raya… sad to say, he could not be advised. this dude never fast for shit  (he used to treat me hotdogs during fasting month. LOL!)… yet he celebrates hari raya as if he ‘earned’ it. of course our friendship didnt last, but wherever he is right now, i wish him well and pardon me for bitching about you.

spring cleaning. this has to be the most laughable one of all. i will make myself an example on this one. mom’s ought to be the cleanest person in the world, or at least in singapore, ok.. at least in the district. Fine! In the block then. Our home (minus my room) has always been in tip top cleanliness. My dad too wouldnt tolerate the sight of a strand of hair on the floor. 21 years in west coast, till now in woodlands. mom n dad’s not the type who will procrastinate on home cleanliness. so when raya comes, wouldnt the house still be in perfect cleanliness state?  of course it is… but again, of course there’s always something to clean. i will be at the end of the grumbling piece of attitude when i am forced to still clean something already clean.

mooooooommmmmmmmmmmm!!!!

on my FB, people will update their statuses of them done with the cleaning of their house… i mean… do you do that when its not hari raya? oh well, the bin dumping area during these period will always be swamped with furnitures, old clothes bla bla bla… all u can see is either a pissed off bangla who had to clear them or a happy one scavenging thru the junks.

one last one will be… we all will take an additional off day from work. hahahahahahh!!

*graphics courtesy of natalie dee

this date has a huge significance in my life. it was a date i fear in 1998. it was the date of enlistment for national service.  a decade ago.. my life changed…

the old kranji camp... our passing out parade

i learnt many good things in life when i was in the army. equally bad things as well. though nothing to be proud of with the bad deeds, it did teach me to be a better person in a way or another. had my first drink, had my…ok. i’ll save it. all in all, not a good way to be exposed to life, but a lesson well learnt.

having fun doing the chores is a good way to get things done

i learnt hardship. earning as little as $240 a month, i barely made thru A weekend. overtime, i learnt how to segregate and deal with money better. trying to stay in camp as much as possible to avoid spending when being out in the real world. a good shopping place would be the pirated clothings from beach road. not to worry about meals for being in camp at most times, and stay home when out of camp. near 12th of every month, all NS boys get excited for the miserable pay. only to have them spent on drinks at hard rock cafe… again… with no other but camp mates. life pretty much revolves around each other…

i was declared as a casualty in some mission

i learnt friendship. gained some.. loose some. battling thru missions over these years. it makes the bond amongst us strong. regardless of race, language or religion… be it from different gang in the outside world, in camp, we are all ‘one shirt’.

ive seen friends who make use of friends. ive seen friends who are in their own world. ive seen friends who would always make his opinions heard. ive seen friends, who would do anything for you. ive seen men cry. ive seen men sad. ive seen men whom try to be something they would never be. ive seen ambitious men. ive seen the low self esteem men. i felt ive seen the whole walk of life.

my platoon... the 7 magnificent. lim, teo, sashi, gabe, ,me, lan, ee ...

we were proud guardsmen, the elite of the army. drilled to such perfection from sadist commanders, we turned out pretty what were expected…. animals! from lorong kebasi, to lim chu kang, to marsiling, to temburong jungle in brunei and to queensland, australia … we’ve gone thru it all.

though not the best companions to travel with, its paid expenses to go overseas. so … why not.

the brunei trip... on the 3rd day of hari raya... if im not mistaken

participating of national events while being operational ready, not the kind of pace any soldier would like. nonetheless, we did manage to get thru it all. there were proud moments… to overshadow the down side. it was a good 2 years wasted spent in the army.

getting to don the no.1 kit was pretty cool...

if i were to asked, what is the few things that i gained from the National Service. my answer would be the the friendship and the memories. i am still a bochup soldier who will only give secondary shit to orders. i will still try to avoid things that would not benefit me in any way.

today, we knew each other for over a decade. i appreciate the friendship with all my fellow 661 gds mates. till we meet again.

yeap... we pooped together

fag

isnt this tad disgusting?

shark boy turns lady boy for a bit… for once i find him cute.. LOL!

photos courtesy of agan harap. more to view at http://www.flickr.com/photos/31199746@N02/

something to laugh

Posted: July 21, 2010 in just for laughs
Tags: , ,

im freaking bored. here’s something to laugh at/about

oommffpp!

*courtesy of daily haha

in·to·na·tion (ĭn’tə-nā’shən, -tō-)
n.

    1. The act of intoning or chanting.
    2. An intoned utterance.
  1. A manner of producing or uttering tones, especially withregard to accuracy of pitch.
  2. Linguistics The use of changing pitch to convey syntacticinformation: a questioning intonation.
  3. A use of pitch characteristic of a speaker or dialect: “He couldhear authority, the old parish intonation coming back into hisvoice” (Graham Greene).
  4. Music The opening phrase of a plainsong composition sung asa solo part.

    *courtesy of dictionary.com

    i need to look up the dictionary for this word… only to discover its real meaning. pardon my shallow vocab…i get agitated easily for the use of words i’ve never heard before. this is too deep for me.

ok, it even hits the news now. the JJ Lin song/cheer (whatever you wanna call that piece) has been aired for months now. 15,231 fans of the “No offence, but the YOG song by JJ Lin sounds retarded.” page on Facebook should be one good reason to why the song failed big time. I can only imagine my friend from States, Pablo, laughing his ass off mimicking the hand motion (haduken!) and singing with his mickey mouse pitched voice as if he swallowed helium.
JJ Lin or Wayne Lin, is a local celeb who gained stardom thru singing, songwriting and acting. he should be seen as a hero. but this one song can turn the tables around pretty quickly. i have a love hate feeling for this dude. for a local to get his fame in manjan countries, he’s a hero in my eyes. but to sing that ********** (unable to describe) song/cheer for the YOG is a pretty embarassing thing to do (for me, at least… aside of me not being patriotic).

"meow"

Have you not seen the video, you ought to be living in third world country or something. It makes me into thinking that JJ Lin childhood is paying 50 cents arcade to play Street Fighter IV. He must’ve idolized Ryu or Ken. Who doesnt!?

“Bit off the dlums… pee on the ground…shoudi aw lao…make me so plawd”

how do we distinguish the difference of a typo error and someone with spelling issues? i guess its rather simple.

rightfully, a typo error is commonly ‘oozed’ outta nowhere in a middle of a well constructed perfect sentence. this also happens when words are typed so fast that the tiny glitch seems faultless. on the other hand, someone who had spelling issues are easily spotted. a blatant error would seem obvious as to perhaps with bad command of grammar.

i fall in the category of the later… but blessed with people who speaks and write awesome English around me.

in this fast paced life, anything and almost everything revolving around us is designed to simplify and automate our daily routines. with regards to this, our SMSes gets auto corrected. The word document could perform a quick spell chick within a single push on the F7 button. All our thoughts to put into words electronically, are well taken care of.

Try them manually… it might end up a little surprising…. like this…

no offence to gilbert, but..

i stumbled upon some funny pictures of the wussy vampire haters in the planet. please do check em out at my facebook photo album. http://ow.ly/27oJj

if these pictures offend any fans, im sorry… but these are too funny… if you’re pissed off with me for posting such… here.. a glimpse of hope..

i usually dont fall for shits like fortune reading, tarots, runes, numerologies, palm reading and all these psychic stuffs. which makes sense to why i frown everytime psych or those crimes solved with help of psychic power are on TV. dont get me wrong, i do respect to people who believe in such practices. but i just kindda dont fancy em much.

recently, i found an unread, crispy newspaper in the bus on my journey home.

who are u shitting??!!

just nice that night, holland beat brazil (my favourite team) 2-1.

I cursed the parakeet. i lost it. im not the one who believes in such things. coincidence was the only reason i can find.

samba’l assed

Posted: June 25, 2010 in just for laughs, Soccer

la congo! what an ass!

Step 1

my office best friend... black widow, the coffee maker

Step 2

sugar with some white love

Step 3

drink it slow… while smoke a cancer stick…

so it was father’s day. yeap. i know… like any other days… its all the same. what difference it is to mother’s day, childrens day, grandparents day, valentines day? nothing. these days which’s ‘supposed’ to be ‘remembered’.. i dont. yadaa yadaaa… people will say that everyday could be father’s day. everyday has to be mother’s day. everyday ought to be valentines day. blaa blaa blaaa and the list goes on. but what are the actual meaning behind this reasoning? to each his own.

it doesnt mean any hoot if i dont celebrate father’s day. i know i love my dad. he knows that… and i believe he loves me too. we dont need ONE day to commemorate them. likewise the other ocassions.

with my other dad, i had an awesome time with him at the golf course the day before. new topics of conversation never fail to light up his talking mood. that was a nice father/son outing with him.

wife ordered a cake from fad for bak. it was a gigantic golf ball cake. good to see him enjoying the moment from his only child.

happy father’s day to all fathers nonetheless… yeah you father gonnabe and wannabes included.

Jokes of the week

Posted: June 11, 2010 in just for laughs
Tags:

Ryan: Dad, what is an idiot?
Faizal (Dad): An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can’t understand him. Do you understand me?
Ryan: No.

Sidek: Hey, man! Please call me a taxi.
Omar: Hi Taxi

Nanu: Doctor! You’ve got to help me! Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say.
Dr Iqbal: Next please!

Gilbert: Doctor, I have a pain in my eye whenever I drink tea.
Dr Wong KS: Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink.

Man said to God — Why did you make women so beautiful?
God said to man — So that you will love them.
Man said to God — But why did you make them so dumb?
God said to man — So that they will love you.

Aliff: Why are all those people running?
Ba: They are running a race to get a cup.
Aliff: Who will get the cup?
Ba: The person who wins.
Aliff: Then why are all the others running?

Ryan: Teacher, can I go to the bathroom?
Teacher: Little Johnny, MAY I go to the bathroom?
Ryan: But I asked first!

capricorn for the day

Posted: June 11, 2010 in Isk
Tags: ,

You may be fighting against your worst enemy now: you.

Your friends may be going out of their way to be very nice to you because they can see that you’re more stressed out than usual.

It’s hard for you to concentrate today because there are so many little things vying for your attention.

But even if you have many chores to do, it still may be wiser to delay them until after you take some personal time for yourself.

sense

Posted: June 8, 2010 in fact, just for laughs
Tags: ,

sense?

some things just makes sense mathematically….

bzzzzzzzzz bzzzzz

i think my hair is residing. wait.. i dont think. i am confirming. not alarming… im ageing. im getting old. i need the volume.

just yesterday, a colleague spotted the patch of white hair on my head… of course i do have white hair. the amount of stress im dealing with daily, even my pubes might turn grey.

im hoping that my hairdo dont turn out like ray romano’s dad.  this might just be retribution for calling bald people ‘padang golf” (golf green). hahaha… its god’s gift… nothing i can do about it.

speaking of golf, the fairway at octville is looking better with the maintenance of the course.

i do hope however,  i still have hair by 40…

read em out loud

funny shit… ever.