Archive for the ‘lessons in life’ Category

ingreed ient

Posted: July 5, 2011 in Food, lessons in life
Tags: ,

learning to cook

not really my way but… yeah… sometimes it happens.

to spit and lick back...

as per the topic, do you mind licking back the saliva (perhaps with some of the green gooey mucus from your tonsils) which you have already spit, back to your taste buds? gross sounding doesn’t it? unacceptable? of course.

well this scenario can also be applied in walks of life. For example;

you bought a phone to replace your old phone. you brag at how your new phone is better than the old one. along the way, you somehow fall apart with your new phone cos your old phone works better and have all the things you need. do you (lick) use back your old phone which you just (spit) dumped?

In similar cases, this scenario can be used for; pets, boyfriends, JOBs, friends, gadgets, JOBs, toys, girlfriends, JOBs, clothes, vehicles, shoes, JOBs … and the list goes on. good thing blood ties doesn’t imply here. or maybe it does…

well, stop wondering to why i blog about this. an interesting story just creeped up my thoughts. thats all. no i’m not venting my anger or whatsoever.

bottomline, my point is, don’t talk so much about the things you left, dispose, dump or throw. you never know when you’ll be needing them….. again.

fear allah

Posted: January 21, 2011 in family, lessons in life

i was touched by what i overheard my brother talking to his 3 years old son when the boy was trembling in fear of cockroaches lurking near the chalet where i had my birthday party.

“ryan, what did ayah tell u? only scared of Allah (swt). dont be scared of anything else” young ryan then braved himself (though still trembling) and walked past the area where he saw the cockroach earlier on. took a peek back to the area.. and continued to play.

im proud of how he instilled that sort of courage to his son.

where silence is not golden

it’ll pinch you. it’ll bite you. it’ll inject all the molecules of sorrow. it’ll penetrate deep through your pores into your marrows.

your throat runs dry. tears will flow. your head feels heavy. your heart stops to glow.

you’ll try to put sense in your ego. you’ll continuously fail. for knowing it all will just derail…

there’ll be no laughter, there’ll be no joy… it’s as good as you lost the boy.

where silence is not golden

this date has a huge significance in my life. it was a date i fear in 1998. it was the date of enlistment for national service.  a decade ago.. my life changed…

the old kranji camp... our passing out parade

i learnt many good things in life when i was in the army. equally bad things as well. though nothing to be proud of with the bad deeds, it did teach me to be a better person in a way or another. had my first drink, had my…ok. i’ll save it. all in all, not a good way to be exposed to life, but a lesson well learnt.

having fun doing the chores is a good way to get things done

i learnt hardship. earning as little as $240 a month, i barely made thru A weekend. overtime, i learnt how to segregate and deal with money better. trying to stay in camp as much as possible to avoid spending when being out in the real world. a good shopping place would be the pirated clothings from beach road. not to worry about meals for being in camp at most times, and stay home when out of camp. near 12th of every month, all NS boys get excited for the miserable pay. only to have them spent on drinks at hard rock cafe… again… with no other but camp mates. life pretty much revolves around each other…

i was declared as a casualty in some mission

i learnt friendship. gained some.. loose some. battling thru missions over these years. it makes the bond amongst us strong. regardless of race, language or religion… be it from different gang in the outside world, in camp, we are all ‘one shirt’.

ive seen friends who make use of friends. ive seen friends who are in their own world. ive seen friends who would always make his opinions heard. ive seen friends, who would do anything for you. ive seen men cry. ive seen men sad. ive seen men whom try to be something they would never be. ive seen ambitious men. ive seen the low self esteem men. i felt ive seen the whole walk of life.

my platoon... the 7 magnificent. lim, teo, sashi, gabe, ,me, lan, ee ...

we were proud guardsmen, the elite of the army. drilled to such perfection from sadist commanders, we turned out pretty what were expected…. animals! from lorong kebasi, to lim chu kang, to marsiling, to temburong jungle in brunei and to queensland, australia … we’ve gone thru it all.

though not the best companions to travel with, its paid expenses to go overseas. so … why not.

the brunei trip... on the 3rd day of hari raya... if im not mistaken

participating of national events while being operational ready, not the kind of pace any soldier would like. nonetheless, we did manage to get thru it all. there were proud moments… to overshadow the down side. it was a good 2 years wasted spent in the army.

getting to don the no.1 kit was pretty cool...

if i were to asked, what is the few things that i gained from the National Service. my answer would be the the friendship and the memories. i am still a bochup soldier who will only give secondary shit to orders. i will still try to avoid things that would not benefit me in any way.

today, we knew each other for over a decade. i appreciate the friendship with all my fellow 661 gds mates. till we meet again.

yeap... we pooped together

so it was father’s day. yeap. i know… like any other days… its all the same. what difference it is to mother’s day, childrens day, grandparents day, valentines day? nothing. these days which’s ‘supposed’ to be ‘remembered’.. i dont. yadaa yadaaa… people will say that everyday could be father’s day. everyday has to be mother’s day. everyday ought to be valentines day. blaa blaa blaaa and the list goes on. but what are the actual meaning behind this reasoning? to each his own.

it doesnt mean any hoot if i dont celebrate father’s day. i know i love my dad. he knows that… and i believe he loves me too. we dont need ONE day to commemorate them. likewise the other ocassions.

with my other dad, i had an awesome time with him at the golf course the day before. new topics of conversation never fail to light up his talking mood. that was a nice father/son outing with him.

wife ordered a cake from fad for bak. it was a gigantic golf ball cake. good to see him enjoying the moment from his only child.

happy father’s day to all fathers nonetheless… yeah you father gonnabe and wannabes included.


Posted: June 7, 2010 in lessons in life
Tags: , ,

if you ever find this motivational… use it.


Posted: March 4, 2010 in f.r.i.e.n.d.s, lessons in life

Intro (Which is also the Chorus)

E                        A                  D      A               E
Smelly Cat, Smeeeelly Cat, What are they feeding You?
E                       A            D     A             E
Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat, It's not Your Fault

Verse 1
E            A          D      A         E
Your obviously not their favorite pet
E            A          D      A         E
And they won't take you to the vet

Verse 2
E            A          D      A         E
It may not be a bed of roses
E            A          D      A         E
And your no friend to those with noses
E                        A                  D      A               E
Smelly Cat, Smeeeelly Cat, What are they feeding You?
E                       A            D     A             E
Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat, It's not Your Faaaaaaaaault

revenge with an action

Posted: February 24, 2010 in lessons in life

ok, this kicks me off when i was in town with one of my counterpart from states. since it was the eve of CNY, he said why not we make a CNY resolution. and so i agreed. best part is, we stopped talking about the resolution after he told me his… this was his;
“there should be only one resolution i wanna have, and thats to allow my wife giving me a blowjob in the morning”
WTF!!!?? how can the list go on when his statement above cant stop us … wait… cant stop ME laughing my ass off? what kind of a resolution is that!!?? … sigh… one of the good laughs we had before he flies back to Cali.
ok that aside, here’s what i had for the new year resolution.
  • not to have an unrealistic resolution
  • to break 100s in golf
  • i wanna be as least hypocrite as possible (we all are.. dare u not admit)
  • be truthful to myself, to be my own true self (i often fake myself to please, which i realize is sooooooo wrong)
  • be a happier person (not that im unhappy)
  • to break 100s in weight (have to watch those calories & cabo loading)
  • to be more open to mushy sappy love/sad songs (unplugging the wawa & overdrives)
have to be enough for now. though nothing serious, this shall not be taken with a pinch of salt/sugar/pepper..

East to the west, south till up north
Every second every moment
Searching… Not giving up … my steps

now you can read?

Close as if I could touch
But the fact is…. You are far

You are the caring, the forgiver, the lover
In many times I’ve disappointed you, Im still not disowned
You are to me like a door which is always open.
Patient and calm waiting for every moment
Even if you are angry, it’s not obvious
Till I forget, your presence is wasted
Never I realize your silence is like volcano…
All of a sudden destroying everything
No more for me the open door.
My regrets came too late

Funny after reading it? of course it does. its a malay song (exists, diammu gunung berapi) direct translated into english. i am just experimenting on how terrible the understanding of a sentence being direct translated. say for example, your first language is english. and you speak fluent english to another chap whose fluent language is not english. chances of a direct translation will happen. and when that happens, it sounds wrong. not only it sounds wrong, it may mislead. its just disasterous.

i had encountered a few occassions where im stuck in both worlds.

its amazing how the terms I & you in other language, particularly in malay MAY sound rude. like how amazing how i could even think about all these nonsence.

“The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any.”

Katharine Whitehorn

i would want to agree big time for the slated quote above by Katharine Whitehorn. Take a good look around you. Take a good look of the 3 different class of human lifestyle. The rich, the average, and the poor.

Who do you think will treasure and learn about the importance of money?

Ok.. OK.. i know, i was being blunt in making such comment. but in GENERAL, no one would dare say that the rich will treasure money more, thus making them learn about money.

The poor wished they had money. The average wished they had more money. The rich will just wish they were richer… us humans, can never be contented with what we have…

Our children (myself included) had been spoilt and pampered with the standards of living in Singapore. throw a rich kid to the back alley of azerbaijan. escort a poor kid into the lifestyle of the rich n famous. be your own judge …. who’d have the more difficult time adapting…

we’re raised in a such that, money could make the world go round. we’re raised in a way that without money, there’s nothing much we can do. without money, there’s nothing you can do. with no money, you are nothing.

How true is the phrase ‘no money, no honey’? i guess, there’s truth to it.

oh gosh! WHAT AM I TALKING ABOUT!!!????

steamy veggie

Posted: January 30, 2009 in fact, lessons in life
Tags: ,

i came across an article on Yahoo on a controversial PETA (an animal rights organization) advertisement. For crying out loud, they are promoting vegetables with a more sexy approach. It was stated in the ad too that vegetarians had better sex. Even though my personal opinion, i think that healthy people are the ones who have better sex , i somehow wish that statement of veggie had better sex’s not true.

here, you take a look at the video and judge it yourself. you think so?

now you wish you were a veggie? heh!

its 0150hrs and im awake. woken by the pile of schoolwork which has been running thru my mind since i left class. this COQ and stuffs are giving me nightmares before i even fall asleep. my excite-o-meter blast to its brim when wife texted me after class. but … nothing much …. supper with bak and wife. then back home, shower and sneep. before the awakening began.

anyways, 2 nights back, i was woken by another dream. a middle aged caucasian lady was patting the bed and pillows and said “lets not let the problems begin from here”. i remembered wife asking me what happened but i just cant bring myself to talk. take a good look around and to ensure that it was all a dream. sheeesh! for a moment i thought it was an encounter with ghost.

ok la.. i wanna go sleep… i hope. wife’s busy catching worms in her dreams already i believe. gu’nite.

Protected: pity

Posted: June 27, 2007 in lessons in life, rants & ramblings
Tags: ,

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Read this off the net. Kindda interesting …

Marriage is a combination of friendship, love, and the intimacy of a physical union. Call it making love, marital relations, or by any other name, it is the pleasurable act and art of sex. We expect it, it is good for our health, we need it, we want it in our marriages so it comes as a surprise when, for one reason or another, we stop having sex.

Pinpointing the reason for lack of sex is the major key to getting back a healthy sex life. Unfortunately too many people put the subject of sex aside either not wanting to discuss it or hoping “things will straighten out on their own eventually.” They won’t.

What are some of the things that cause no sex marriages? Our frenetic lifestyles for one. We tend to put sex last on our daily “to do” list. Work, kids, activities, long hours of “day-into-night,” all lead to exhaustion and exhaustion leads to lack of sex drive. How romantic can you be when you can barely keep your eyes open? As one harried mother and wife put it:

“I hate to say it like this but, at the end of the day, sex is just one more chore.”

Researchers have found that when couples in a so-called sexless marriage are able to get away from family and work, and vacation on their own, their sexual activity is comparable to honeymoon sex. Sex becomes a priority when they are relaxed and stress is a distant memory. They have time and energy to devote to each other.

The solution to a lifestyle that physically drains you is to take stock immediately of what you and your spouse need to be sexually active with each other. Is getting away for a weekend out of the question or is it a possibility? Can you have quiet time at least once a week at an hour early enough so that you’re both still relatively fresh?
How important is the sexual side of your relationship to both of you? Be honest with each other.

Take charge of your life. Be your own manager. If you were paid to schedule time for someone else, you would. Why not treat yourself the same as you would another person? Your pay can be the reward of being with the person you love.

A second reason for no sex is the “anger syndrome.” Can you make love with a person with whom you are angry? Do you hold on to anger and let it smolder, keeping your spouse away? Anger is one of the least productive emotions. It drains you and keeps you from living. Get rid of it! Who’s right or who’s wrong doesn’t matter in the long run and snuggling up to “anger” just doesn’t feel as good as cuddling with your mate. Remember: Anger isn’t kissable, touchable, or sexy!

The last reason for no sex may be more serious than the other two mentioned. If stress, overwork, exhaustion, or fighting is not the reason for lack of sex it may be time to see a doctor. Health problems, both physical and mental, can cause a drop in sex drive.

Get a complete physical check-up and be frank with your doctor. Physical problems from diabetes, thyroid, menstrual cycles, menopause, prostate, arthritis, etc. can be affecting your libido. Remind your doctor of any medications you may be on, even those over–the-counter ones we pick up so casually. If you’re going to a new doctor, bring a list of any meds you take.

Depression also affects sexual desire.Tell your doctor if feeling sad or “down” is a continuous feeling.You may need medication to help alleviate depression. Be aware however, that some anti-depression medication can also lower sexual desire.Discuss medication that will have a low sexual side effect.

Doctors are willing to help; just be open and honest about your sexual problems. This is not the time to be embarrassed. There is rarely anything she or he hasn’t heard before. Sex is healthy and normal and an expression of a healthy normal relationship.

Remember you are in charge of your life and your sex life. Make time for the both of you. Enjoy each other.


Posted: June 27, 2007 in lessons in life
Tags: , ,

“treasure what you have beside you now cos you may regret losing them much later”. another caption kopped on kemek’s MSN. how true. how true.

i think it needs a certain maturity level to really really understand this. back then, treasuring someone, be it family members or friends, can be so complacent. slowly, incidents by incidents, i see the true meaning behind it. back then, i dont care much what my brother is up to, what my parents are doing … but now, with this in mind, it just tightened the bond. i got closer to brother. i love my parents more. when i no longer stay under one roof with them, it made me realise so many things which i have taken granted for over the 27 years.
if they are to leave the world, i will want them to leave knowing that i love them. if i were to leave, i want them to know that i leave loving them.
i love my family.

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Dan Ingat, 7C’s SEBAB SUAMI BENCIKAN ISTERI (dari Dr Fadillah Kamsah )Untuk semua isteri, bakal isteri dan jugak yg beristeri …
C1. CABAR Isteri nie kalau bergaduh dengan suami mulalah kata “Kalau awak berani cubalah [cabar suami cari perempuan lain]! Dr Fadillah kata
JGN CABAR SUAMI nanti suami buat betul-betul isteri juga yg putih mata …
C2. CABUL Perbuatan & kata2 isteri yang tak sopan (isteri hilang sifat malu) seperti keluarkan kata2 yg tidak baik pada mertua …
C3. CELUPAR Celupar nie suku-sakat cabul juga. Isteri selalu cakap yg kotor, mungkin kadang2 terlepas cakap …
C4. COMOT Isteri bila nak keluar rumah aje baru nak comel tapi kat rumah comot. Suami pula di opis dok nampak yg comel2 aje … Ade isteri kata – mekap untuk >suami, … tapi kat rumah tak mekap pun …
C5. CEMBURU Suami lemas kalau isteri cemburu berlebih-lebihan … sikit2 dok telefon suami kat opis. Suami baru balik kerja dah kita tanya macam-macam. Suami balik lewat overtime dah syak yg bukan2 …
C6. CEREWET Suami tak suka bila isteri cerewet tak bertempat
C7. CINCAI Buat kerja rumah cincai, masak cincai, kemas rumah cincai, jaga anak cincai… Dr Fadillah kata suami paling benci bila isteri cincai jaga anak… anak dah masuk longkang tapi mak dok lepak depan tv lagi …7C’s ni lambang keperibadian muslimah yang lemah akhlaknya … Berpelajaran tinggi belum tentu tinggi akhlaknya. Tapi kita ni insan yg mudah lupa & lalai … ada masa2 tertentu, mungkin juga kerana sifat suami & keadaan sekeliling yang buat kita mempunyai salah satu ciri2x 7C tu …
I came across this on the internet. and how cool of someone to list it out. hehehe….. somehow there are truth in it.
The 7 C’s stated above translated in English are actually (trying my best). 7 reasons to why husbands hate their wives…

1. Challenge – a wife who likes to challenge the husband during an arguement
2. lewd – language used by the wife
3. obscene – foul method of communication
4. messy – bottomline is to look presentable for the husband, even at home
5. jealous – the husband will feel swamped if the wife is overjealous
6. fussy – fussiness at inappropriate timing
7. casual – does thing as she pleases

am i?

Posted: September 25, 2006 in Isk, lessons in life, rants & ramblings
Tags: , , , , ,

am i too full of myself?
why do i get into unecessary trouble?
havent i been using my brains well enuff?
where has my common sense go?
am i the role model for the lousiest person on planet earth?
do i really sucked?
do i think that what i always do is correct?
am i full of myself?

am i full of myself?
do i even think before i say anything?
do i see the circumstances before acting?
am i thinking like an adult?
am i being childish?
am i being too selfish?
do i ever put in other’s feelings before mine like how i was told to?
am i being complacent in life?
am i too full of myself?

am i too full of myself?
do i really care?
do i really share?
do i really worth living or better off a living dead?
do i say the darnest things?
am i full of crap?
am i being able to lead?
do i still have my senses in me?
do i?
am i?

Looking at the mirror
staring at myself
am i thinking about u or
was it all for myself?

are we singaporeans complaining too much?

here are a few snippets i get from some local webbie

“maybe not many singaporeans have entertainment for them… so they start this complaining thing… but they always complain blindly…”

“The unfortunate thing is many singaporeans are not equipped with this kind
of mindset”

“Singaporeans definitely like to complain…now I have difficulty getting to read myfavourite Japanese mangas because some people complain some of the comics are too XXX for kids…sob…for goodness sake what about those magazines on the rack which talk about SEX or others most of the time. Maybe they should rate the books like they did to the movies & get people to
produce their ICs b4 buying!”

“As a foreigner living in Singapore, I do find that Singaporeans complain too much about what seem like pretty trivial matters to me. Which is why I can’t stand reading those Forum pages in ST or Today.”

“Sometimes, I can’t “tahan” Singaporeans. I find that the majority of us like to complain so much, it is amazing. In addition to being “kiasu”, now we are picking up this new trait of complaining. When something happens and it is
not to our liking, the first suggestion is to complain to Straits Times forum, or CASE.What’s wrong with us?”

familiar? are you one of those complaining or among those complaining abt
the complainers. apart from our beloved country being a FINE city, its now
marking its trade in the complaining industry. how impressive. why? shy? face it… we are a bunch of whiners after all. yeah me included to a certain extend….

so go on complain… make ourselves heard. well done lads. we know, only animals dont complain. so if u cant tolerate complains.. perhaps the forest might be a good place for u to stay. never the concrete jungle where the monkeys complain non-stop.

Outsourcing (or contracting out) is often defined as the delegation of non-core operations or jobs from internal production within a business to an external entity (such as a subcontractor) that specializes in that operation. Outsourcing is a business decision that is often made to lower costs or focus on competencies. A related term, offshoring, means transferring work to another country, typically overseas. Offshoring is similar to outsourcing when companies hire overseas subcontractors, but differs when companies transfer work to the same company in another country. “Outsourcing” became a popular buzzword in business and management in the mid-1990s.

So just how much does outsourcing affects the workforce, the business and the country’s prosperity? I am not quite a big fan of oursourcing myself. But it does wonders. As much as I hate it, i love it. It solves all problems which we may thought that its a dead end. It does saves money. It saves time, implementation costings, operational costings and manpower costings.. bla bla bla …. so why is it still being hated!?

i personally think that it limits one’s skill technically.. or maybe even academically. the integrity of a company that outsources also might be affected. this also means that some will loose their job.

well whatever it is, its still a pain in the ass if its threatening you.. and its a gift from heaven if it serves your nature right. tell me about it. heh!

there’s these 2 dude who just joined the department recently impressed me. i mean it … im really impressed. he symbolizes the opposite of what singaporeans are, in certain aspects.

despite the pay they’re drawing (nothing to be proud about.. i should say its rather demeaning) they have the absolute character and attitude towards work. very unlike the typical singaporeans who just cant stop whining about their pay, too much work load, too little prospects bla bla bla .. and the list of 1000 whines goes never ending…

gentleman A has gotta bad past. was convicted, and now climbing his way back for public acceptance. his work, i’d rate a 9.7 out of 10. despite of his not impressive education background, he tries and kept on trying to get his understanding of the job better each time. of course he does need the guidance. he has never complain about his work. hardly hear him sigh when a task was given. smiling .. always.

gentleman B looks like he’s with a decent education. his command of english was pretty good too. even though busy with task given, never failed to help the rest with his own initiative. chirpy and jovial boy, he asks questions which are sensible to the brain.

some things they have in common. both are down to earth, humble and very hardworking (just like me). never, never late for work. some things which lacked in a typical singaporeans workforce (myself included also). which brings me to remember 2 M aunties i recruited a year ago…. lazy, ‘complainful’ and horrible working attitude. period. i have a soft spot for people who are humble and down to earth. a very soft spot indeed. does that mean i can get easily cheated? not quite…

A & B, u two are the bestest.

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ok.. ive been sick. diagnosed by the doctor with borderline high blood pressure and some other crappy stuffs like my breathing has got whizzing, bronchospasm and shits like that. its only irritating when i start coughing. its dry, its painful on the throat and chest. but things seemed a little better today. not that its totally gone, but i felt there was improvements. ok so i gotta see the doctor dre again.

gosh… he’s asking me to slow down on the ciggies. ya think i can? was it all about the mindset? i dont know. lately, ive been smoking a lil too much too. i dont blame it on stress.. and i dont know why. it seems like its becoming a major problem… i smoke when i wake up, everytime i took my morning dumps, walking to the car, starting the car engine, walking to the office from the carpark, 9.30am, lunchtime, 3.30pm,5.30pm, 6pm, on my way to meet babs, everytime babs lights up a ciggie i will also follow, on the way back after meeting babs, while walking home, in the house before shower and one before sleeping. wow. thats a lot of ciggies and lungs getting burnt. i’ll fuckin die in no time man …

i remembered seeing this poster saying that ‘a cigarette smoked, lessen 5 mins of your life’. and if i were to be paranoid about whats being said, i will be shitting in my pants knowing that i will die anytime soon man.

tops this all, i still have to do something about my smoking. i really want to throw this habit away. its expensive, uncool, unhealthy and worst of all, it shows that i am not taking good care of my asthmatic wife. apart from the smoking and the religious stuffs, i guess i have been very good towards her. ive never treated and loved someone like how and what im doing right now. but… ok nuff said. im blabbering too much. chao.

ok.. ive been sick. diagnosed by the doctor with borderline high blood and some other crappy stuffs like my breathing has got whizzing and shits like that. its only irritating when i start coughing. its dry, its painful on the throat and chest. but things seemed a little better today. not that its totally gone, but i felt there was improvements. ok so i gotta see the doctor dre again.

gosh… he’s asking me to slow down on the ciggies. ya think i can? was it all about the mindset? i dont know. lately, ive been smoking a lil too much too. i dont blame it on stress.. and i dont know why. it seems like its becoming a major problem… i smoke when i wake up, everytime i took my morning dumps, walking to the car, starting the car engine, walking to the office from the carpark, 9.30am, lunchtime, 3.30pm,5.30pm, 6pm, on my way to meet babs, everytime babs lights up a ciggie i will also follow, on the way back after meeting babs, while walking home, in the house before shower and one before sleeping. wow. thats a lot of ciggies and lungs getting burnt. i’ll fuckin die in no time man … i remembered seeing this poster saying that ‘a cigarette smoked, lessen 5 mins of your life’. and if i were to be paranoid about whats being said, i will be shitting in my pants knowing that i will die anytime soon man.

tops this all, i still have to do something about my smoking. i really want to throw this habit away. its expensive, uncool, unhealthy and worst of all, it shows that i am not taking good care of my asthmatic wife. but…
ok nuff said. im blabbering too much. chao.

mental fengshui

Posted: September 1, 2006 in Isk, lessons in life
Tags: , ,

ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.
THREE. Don’t believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.
FOUR. When you say, “I love you,” mean it.
FIVE. When you say, “I’m sorry,” look the person in the eye.
SIX Be engaged at least six months before you get married
SEVEN.. Believe in love at first sight.
EIGHT.. Never laugh at anyone’s dreams. People who don’t have dreams don’t have much.
NINE. Love deeply and passionately.. You might get hurt but it’s the only way to live life completely.
TEN.. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.
ELEVEN. Don’t judge people by their relatives.
TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.
THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don’t want to answer, smile and ask, “Why do you want to know?”
FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
FIFTEEN. Say “bless you” when you hear someone sneeze.
SIXTEEN. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson
SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R’s: Respect for self; Respect for others; and responsibility for all your actions.
EIGHTEEN. Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
NINETEEN. When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

Talking and listening are probably the most important skills in a relationship. There’ll always be tensions and disagreements, but if you can communicate well, you can overcome almost any problem. agreeable? yeah. of course.
how do people react?there are people who will sleep thru it and will be ok with it the next morning. some will just go on and on like there is no tomorrow. some will act as if nothing happened. some will take it to their parents. some appoint counsellors. some will sit and think thru it in the most peaceful manner. some will share it with friends. some will talk to their pets. some take it out on drinking. some do take revenge.
all the above mentioned are tiny ways on how people react when they reach to some disagreement. of cos there are more not being listed… it could possibly fill up my entire blog page. heh!

so does reprimanding works? yes it does… no it doesnt. to some, they couldve got their lesson learnt and never to repeat the same mistakes again. but to some its just like someone undressing him/her in public. or maybe a dunk to the morale and will never get their lesson learnt.

myself, have problem with arguements. i do behave strangely when in one. sometimes, i will keep quiet. sometimes i will burst out in anger. sometimes i will bring it to sleep. sometimes i will drag it in me for days. (without letting the other knowing of course) but from what i’ve observed so far, i will keep the silent and then try to reason out. i would prefer my arguements to finish off within that 24 hours itself. all these will be accompanied by the oblique face of course. as much as i wish to get it over and done with within the next few minutes, there is nothing much i can do. i will usually let it get its way and move on from there. is this my weakness? yes it is cos problem might not get resolved. no its not becos if two hot headed people collide, when will be the end?

my quarrells with friends usually didnt last till he/she becomes my enemy. with colleagues, it usually die off the next working day. with family, it will get over when some new topic or issue is being arised. with my other half, when we both start to think how much we love each other and how good we are at communicating with each other. tops of all these, i will usually ensure that i will be the first to apologise. even though i may not be in the wrong. but hey.. someone has to start rite. apology doesnt cost a single cent.. but it can be misused. for example when the problem is becoming persistent. a sorry could be taken for granted. which is also wrong. a day gone wrong and with me not apologizing will be so stressfull that it will affect my sleep. it might be even for the slightest matter. but i will never be at ease.
anyways, for couples who are in some arguements/quarells, its better to solve the issue right away. pull urself together before bursting out. know your conflict pattern/style. think about how to avoid the arguement. think of ways to make peace. learn from the arguements. talk and listen cos communication is still the best skill in a relationship. before ur lady starts to avoid ur calls, closing the door while ur still struggling with ur shoes outside her house, starts calling you by your full name .. u might want to think deep about this whole communication thingy.

true enough arguement sucks.. but it will still be there as long as u breathe… cos the bottomline is.. never two people are the same. so dont start thinking that you are always right and the way u solve things is how other solve theirs. communications…….
so much to write for the beggining of the month. wat the.. ok its 2am… time to sleep. good night all….morning i mean…. *yawn* i guess my babs is asleep. she left me again… didnt wait for me… nevermind. i’ll smack her bum bums later after her class…

i’ve been thinkin… wat could i do next in life. i sould say more or less, the objectives are met. i’ve got my career path well taken care of, my love life has never been deteriorating, the relationship with my family somehow is getting good again, friends… ermm.. here and there but its still ok. but some things are still in need of tweakings. my spending habits, my diet, my religion, my self being .. all need some improvement.

yeah financially ive been getting quite an OK sum to survive till month end. but have i ever been contributing much to the house utilities? Not really. My diet needs some close observations. Sometimes i eat like there is no tomorrow. It is really affecting my health. my fagging … oh, it disgust me as much. ive not been really practising with religion matters. i know its gotta start somewhere. as discussed with wifey, i will source for some mosques nearby and start attending lessons. as for my self being, im a little changed as a person. with wifey, she added more senses in my meaningless life. and i have a reason to live.

oh my, why am i getting so emotional. heh!