Archive for the ‘rants & ramblings’ Category

to spit and lick back...

as per the topic, do you mind licking back the saliva (perhaps with some of the green gooey mucus from your tonsils) which you have already spit, back to your taste buds? gross sounding doesn’t it? unacceptable? of course.

well this scenario can also be applied in walks of life. For example;

you bought a phone to replace your old phone. you brag at how your new phone is better than the old one. along the way, you somehow fall apart with your new phone cos your old phone works better and have all the things you need. do you (lick) use back your old phone which you just (spit) dumped?

In similar cases, this scenario can be used for; pets, boyfriends, JOBs, friends, gadgets, JOBs, toys, girlfriends, JOBs, clothes, vehicles, shoes, JOBs … and the list goes on. good thing blood ties doesn’t imply here. or maybe it does…

well, stop wondering to why i blog about this. an interesting story just creeped up my thoughts. thats all. no i’m not venting my anger or whatsoever.

bottomline, my point is, don’t talk so much about the things you left, dispose, dump or throw. you never know when you’ll be needing them….. again.

the sleeping beauty

Posted: November 20, 2010 in rants & ramblings
Tags: ,

they said, a woman’s beauty lies when she’s asleep. whoever they are… i do believe in that bit.


my sleeping beauty

where silence is not golden

it’ll pinch you. it’ll bite you. it’ll inject all the molecules of sorrow. it’ll penetrate deep through your pores into your marrows.

your throat runs dry. tears will flow. your head feels heavy. your heart stops to glow.

you’ll try to put sense in your ego. you’ll continuously fail. for knowing it all will just derail…

there’ll be no laughter, there’ll be no joy… it’s as good as you lost the boy.

where silence is not golden

hazey wazey

Posted: October 25, 2010 in rants & ramblings

PSI index as of noon today is 37. compared to the likes of 90s the past few days. i think the rain helped a lot.

screw you people who taunt the sumatra burnings. its their archipelago which helped us from facing natural disasters. (macam paham)

its hari raya. everyone wants to look nice. some just wanna look different.

the first few days of going to relative’s place, this one thing i noticed on people’s roving eyes. though i cant confirm what exactly is on their mind (especially ladies), one can easily tell that they were checking out each other’s outfit. the guys will have a lesser evil look on them.

to me, its a huge “SO WHAT??!!” be it exclusive ( i hate this term), be it plain or fancy, be it new or past year’s, be it nice looking or eyesore.. its a piece of traditional clothing which one probably put on only during festive season or people’s wedding for god’s sake. Honestly, it doesnt mean anything much to me. And yes, if we were to follow some believes or practise, we were to get new set of clothings. but for practicality’s sake, that statement sucks!

of being different

wife and i were with bert and family at geylang on a few occasions to get hari raya stuffs. you see some spend their hearts (and wallets) out for this joyous occasion. i always tell myself that i hope these people wont spend beyond their ‘affordability’.  lets take the carpets for instance. their sale of carpets there were insane. every year, there will be people buying carpets. if those were the same people, and they were buying carpets every ‘effing’ year, does this mean they have 10 carpets over 10 years of hari raya?!

true, its not my problem. thus, me making noise to myself and my imaginary friends.

"you pay for it!" ...

i believe, if only people celebrate hari raya with much practicality, the other avenues could be channeled for the needy. those orphans… those elderlies at ‘homes’. they probably deserved better.

always had this argument with a friend ages ago…. he would spend with all his might to get this festive period ‘perfect’. he would spend on the expensive stuffs just for this one month of hari raya… sad to say, he could not be advised. this dude never fast for shit  (he used to treat me hotdogs during fasting month. LOL!)… yet he celebrates hari raya as if he ‘earned’ it. of course our friendship didnt last, but wherever he is right now, i wish him well and pardon me for bitching about you.

spring cleaning. this has to be the most laughable one of all. i will make myself an example on this one. mom’s ought to be the cleanest person in the world, or at least in singapore, ok.. at least in the district. Fine! In the block then. Our home (minus my room) has always been in tip top cleanliness. My dad too wouldnt tolerate the sight of a strand of hair on the floor. 21 years in west coast, till now in woodlands. mom n dad’s not the type who will procrastinate on home cleanliness. so when raya comes, wouldnt the house still be in perfect cleanliness state?  of course it is… but again, of course there’s always something to clean. i will be at the end of the grumbling piece of attitude when i am forced to still clean something already clean.


on my FB, people will update their statuses of them done with the cleaning of their house… i mean… do you do that when its not hari raya? oh well, the bin dumping area during these period will always be swamped with furnitures, old clothes bla bla bla… all u can see is either a pissed off bangla who had to clear them or a happy one scavenging thru the junks.

one last one will be… we all will take an additional off day from work. hahahahahahh!!

*graphics courtesy of natalie dee

in·to·na·tion (ĭn’tə-nā’shən, -tō-)

    1. The act of intoning or chanting.
    2. An intoned utterance.
  1. A manner of producing or uttering tones, especially withregard to accuracy of pitch.
  2. Linguistics The use of changing pitch to convey syntacticinformation: a questioning intonation.
  3. A use of pitch characteristic of a speaker or dialect: “He couldhear authority, the old parish intonation coming back into hisvoice” (Graham Greene).
  4. Music The opening phrase of a plainsong composition sung asa solo part.

    *courtesy of

    i need to look up the dictionary for this word… only to discover its real meaning. pardon my shallow vocab…i get agitated easily for the use of words i’ve never heard before. this is too deep for me.

ok, it even hits the news now. the JJ Lin song/cheer (whatever you wanna call that piece) has been aired for months now. 15,231 fans of the “No offence, but the YOG song by JJ Lin sounds retarded.” page on Facebook should be one good reason to why the song failed big time. I can only imagine my friend from States, Pablo, laughing his ass off mimicking the hand motion (haduken!) and singing with his mickey mouse pitched voice as if he swallowed helium.
JJ Lin or Wayne Lin, is a local celeb who gained stardom thru singing, songwriting and acting. he should be seen as a hero. but this one song can turn the tables around pretty quickly. i have a love hate feeling for this dude. for a local to get his fame in manjan countries, he’s a hero in my eyes. but to sing that ********** (unable to describe) song/cheer for the YOG is a pretty embarassing thing to do (for me, at least… aside of me not being patriotic).


Have you not seen the video, you ought to be living in third world country or something. It makes me into thinking that JJ Lin childhood is paying 50 cents arcade to play Street Fighter IV. He must’ve idolized Ryu or Ken. Who doesnt!?

“Bit off the dlums… pee on the ground…shoudi aw lao…make me so plawd”

how do we distinguish the difference of a typo error and someone with spelling issues? i guess its rather simple.

rightfully, a typo error is commonly ‘oozed’ outta nowhere in a middle of a well constructed perfect sentence. this also happens when words are typed so fast that the tiny glitch seems faultless. on the other hand, someone who had spelling issues are easily spotted. a blatant error would seem obvious as to perhaps with bad command of grammar.

i fall in the category of the later… but blessed with people who speaks and write awesome English around me.

in this fast paced life, anything and almost everything revolving around us is designed to simplify and automate our daily routines. with regards to this, our SMSes gets auto corrected. The word document could perform a quick spell chick within a single push on the F7 button. All our thoughts to put into words electronically, are well taken care of.

Try them manually… it might end up a little surprising…. like this…

no offence to gilbert, but..

i usually dont fall for shits like fortune reading, tarots, runes, numerologies, palm reading and all these psychic stuffs. which makes sense to why i frown everytime psych or those crimes solved with help of psychic power are on TV. dont get me wrong, i do respect to people who believe in such practices. but i just kindda dont fancy em much.

recently, i found an unread, crispy newspaper in the bus on my journey home.

who are u shitting??!!

just nice that night, holland beat brazil (my favourite team) 2-1.

I cursed the parakeet. i lost it. im not the one who believes in such things. coincidence was the only reason i can find.

Step 1

my office best friend... black widow, the coffee maker

Step 2

sugar with some white love

Step 3

drink it slow… while smoke a cancer stick…

bzzzzzzzzz bzzzzz

i think my hair is residing. wait.. i dont think. i am confirming. not alarming… im ageing. im getting old. i need the volume.

just yesterday, a colleague spotted the patch of white hair on my head… of course i do have white hair. the amount of stress im dealing with daily, even my pubes might turn grey.

im hoping that my hairdo dont turn out like ray romano’s dad.  this might just be retribution for calling bald people ‘padang golf” (golf green). hahaha… its god’s gift… nothing i can do about it.

speaking of golf, the fairway at octville is looking better with the maintenance of the course.

i do hope however,  i still have hair by 40…

my luv for medusa

i have been in love with medusa since im a little boy. perhaps i am that evil inside me…

people i’d like to meet in heaven

1. salleh & taib, my awesome grandpas
2. radin maimunah radin adli, my equally awesome grandma
3.  nargis hussein, superwoman mother in law
4. gandhi
5. princess diana

1. Savannah Smiles
2.  Tupac Shakur
3. Michael Jackson
4. Kurt Cobain
5. Anna Nicole Smith

surangani !!

Posted: May 21, 2010 in lyrics, music, rants & ramblings
Tags: , , , ,

Surangani Surangani

Suranganita malu genawaa
Surangani Surangani
Suranganita malu genawaa
Surangani Surangani
Surangaita malu genawaa

Maalu maalu malu
dan genapu malu
Suranganita malu genawa

Lajja nadde me
Pare handanne
Vatin pitin bala sitinewa
Oya handenewa
Oyage as rathu venewa
Bala sitina matath handenewa

Lajja nadde me
Pare handanne
Vatin pitin bala sitinewa
Oya handenewa
Oyage as rathu venewa
Bala sitina matath handenewa

Surangani Surangani
Suranganita malu genawa
Malu malu malu
Dan genapu malu
Suranganita malu genawa

Mokada manda me
Malu noganne
Kenthhiyen wage innewa
Epa kiyanawa
Genapu hinda baninawa
Mage ange malu natanewa

Mokada manda me
Malu noganne
Kenthhiyen wage innewa
Epa kiyanawa
Genapu hinda baninawa
Mage ange malu natanewa

Surangani Surangani
Suranganita malu genawa
Surangani Surangani
Suranganita malu genawa

Surangani Surangani
Surangaita malu genawa
Malu malu malu,
Dan genapu malu,
Suranganita malu genawa

Surangani Surangani
Surangaita malu genawa
Malu malu malu
dan genapu malu
Suranganita malu genawa

*courtesy of Sinhalse

thats the original i assume… here’s how my camp mates sing it

Surangani Surangani
Surangaita malu genawa
Malu malu malu
dan genapu malu
Suranganita malu genawa

once the papa shot the mama under the mango tree
so the papa tell the mama will u marry me
i love you
u love me
we are the lovers in the street

Surangani Surangani
Surangaita malu genawa
Malu malu malu
dan genapu malu
Suranganita malu genawa

oh my baby dont be shy,
give me your body let me try
i love you
u love me
we are the lovers in the street

on how u actually use the F word...

all sorts of tits

all sorts of asses


NOT phoebe’s smelly cat

Posted: February 24, 2010 in rants & ramblings
Tags: ,

the kungfu cat

it might be a resurrected bruce li

just fo laughs

Posted: September 23, 2009 in rants & ramblings
Tags: ,
101 positions vs 102 excuses, damn woman is prepared

101 positions vs 102 excuses, damn woman is prepared

jazzy creeps

Posted: September 14, 2009 in rants & ramblings
Tags: , ,


listen to this… by Karen Souza. nice shit. if you’re not into jazz, then bugger off…

buaya bin birdie

Posted: August 13, 2009 in Golf, rants & ramblings


A colleague/golf friend of mine called me buaya for witnessing me getting a birdie.

a buaya for a birdie?

main tip from;

The best way to look great in the long-term when you’re overweight is to lose excess weight with the help of a proper diet and exercise program. Once you start dropping pounds, your clothes will fit better and your confidence will increase along with your motivation to try new fashions and styles

  1. No tight clothes
  2. No sloped shoulders
  3. No bold prints! (What?!!)
  4. Let that pants rest on the hips, NOT waist! Also avoid pleated pants.
  5. Empty that damn pocket.
  6. Wear V-neck tops.
  7. Stand up straight.

*do u really need explanations for the above?fatman

Avoiding these tips is just like covering the centre bald head with the side hairs.

my first tat

Posted: June 24, 2009 in rants & ramblings
Tags: , ,

i had my first tatoo done last weekend. it was something i’ve always wanted. a gecko crawling up my leg. Walaaaaa!


my airbrushed tatoo... *fake*

my airbrushed tatoo... *fake*

Joke of the Decade

Posted: May 19, 2009 in rants & ramblings

This one ought to be in here… joke of the year

A first-grade teacher, Ms Neelam was having trouble with one of her
students the teacher asked, “Boy, what is your problem?”
The boy answered, “I’m too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in
the third-grade and I’m smarter than she is! I think I should be in
the third-grade too!”

Ms. Neelam had enough. She took the boy to the principal’s office.
While the boy waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to
the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms Neelam he
would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his
questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave. She
agreed. The boy was brought in and the conditions were explained to
him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: “What is 3 x 3?”
Boy: “9”.
Principal: “What is 6 x 6?”
Boy: “36”.

And so it went with every question the principal thought a
third-grade should know. The principal looks at Ms. Neelam and tells
her, “I think Boy can go to the third-grade.”

Ms. Neelam says to the principal, “I have some of my own questions.
Can I ask him ?” The principal and Boy both agree.

Ms. Neelam asks, “What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?
Boy, after a moment “Legs.”

Ms. Neelam: “What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?”
Boy: “Pockets.”

Ms. Neelam: What starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval,
delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?
Boy: Coconut

Ms. Neelam: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?
The principal’s eyes open really wide and before he could stop the
answer, Boy was taking charge.
Boy: Bubblegum

Ms. Neelam: What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down
and a dog does on three legs? The principal’s eyes open really wide
and before he could stop the answer…
Boy: Shake hands

Ms. Neelam: Now I will ask some “Who am I” sort of questions, okay?
Boy: Yep.

Ms. Neelam: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me
up. I get wet before you do.
Boy: Tent

Ms. Neelam: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you’re
bored. The best man always has me first. The Principal was looking
restless, a bit tense and took one large Patiala Vodka peg.
Boy: Wedding Ring

Ms. Neelam: I come in many sizes. When I’m not well, I drip. When you
blow me, you feel good.
Boy: Nose

Ms. Neelam: I have a stiff shaft. My! tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.
Boy: Arrow

Ms. Neelam: What word starts with a ‘F’ and ends in ‘K’ that means
lot of heat and excitement?
Boy: Firetruck

Ms. Neelam: What word starts with a ‘F’ and ends in ‘K’ & if you
don’t get it you have to use your hand.
Boy: Fork

Ms. Neelam: What is it that all men have one of it’s longer on some
men than on others, the pope doesn’t use his and a man gives it to
his wife after they’re married?

Ms. Neelam: What part of the man has no bone but has muscles, has
lots of veins, like pumping, & is responsible for making love ?

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the teacher,
“Send this Boy to the University, I got the last ten questions wrong

stripes-fatWhether you’ve got a hot date or big interview, read on for some great tips on how to look slimmer.


  1. Buy clothes that fit you. Whether you are a size 8 or a size 48, if you wear the wrong size clothes, you’ll end up looking bigger than you are. Wearing clothes that are too tight leads to bulges and lumps, so try things on before you buy them. And choosing clothes which are too big adds to your size and makes you look fatter.
  2. Choose items which skim over areas you want to disguise. For instance, if you want to make your tummy look flatter, move away from skin tight vests, and choose a flattering tunic. Instead of choosing a mini skirt, hide chunky thighs under a floaty skirt. However if you go baggy, this will also make you look larger.
  3. Make sure you are wearing the right underwear. Thongs and g-strings are all well and good if you have no fat on your body, but if you want to give the illusion of a skinny figure, go for supportive styles which help to pull in the tummy. A well fitting bra can also help to create a smoother slimmer figure.
  4. Highlight your good bits! If you have a beautiful slender neck, but a bit of weight on your waistline, draw attention to your neck with an eyecatching necklace, or other accessories. If you have toned arms, wear a sleeveless top to make the most of your assets.
  5. Work on your posture. Stand up straight, pull your stomach in, and your shoulders back. You can practice posture by balancing a book on your head and walking – the book shouldn’t fall off! Whenever you get the chance, look in the mirror and make sure you are not hunched over. This is possibly the MOST important tip, as bad posture can add pounds visually.


  • Black is great as a quick fix as it is very slimming.

  • Vertical stripes give the illusion of slimness, but watch out – horizontal stripes do the opposite**

  • When choosing vertical stripes, go for the narrow ones. Broad stripes can make you look larger. However, be aware that very clingy and/or tight vertically striped clothing will accentuate every blip and bulge.
  • Be confident – it’s the best way to make people notice you!
  • Just because it’s the latest fad doesn’t mean it’ll look good on you. Learn to choose clothes that flatter your figure, and not just because it’s the hottest style. If you must, try to select a variant of the style that will work best for you.
  • Never wear anything shiny over an area you are trying to hide.
  • Contrary to popular belief, larger people can wear brighter colored clothes as long as their clothes work with their body and fit properly.

DelayNoMore = Diu lay lo mo

Posted: April 9, 2009 in rants & ramblings

my brother’s caption read Delay No More… so i went “hey! thats the brand of undies my wife got me…”. to my surprise was his explanation behind the brand…. here goes.

“Delay no more” comes from Cantonese foul words with similar sounds (Diu lay lo mo), which means “fuck your mother”.

Seldom used seriously and speak in verbally. “Delay no more” appears in writing as joke among Hong Kong people. A fashion brand in Hong Kong produced T-shirts with “DelayNoMore” on it and advertised it on large billboards.

numbers history

Posted: March 12, 2009 in rants & ramblings
Tags: ,

The numbers we write are made up of algorithms, (1, 2, 3, 4, etc) called arabic algorithms, to distinguish them from the roman algorithms (I; II; III; IV; etc.).
The arabs popularise these algorithms, but their origin goes back to the phenecian merchants that used them to count and do their commercial contability.

The arabs popularise these algorithms, but their origin goes back to the phenecian merchants that used them to count and do their commercial contability.

Have you ever asked the question why 1 is “one”, 2 is “two”, 3 is “three”…..?
What is the logic that exist in the arabic algorithms?
There are angles!

Look at these algorithms written in their primitive form and check it up! …

And the most interesting and intelligent of all…..

my atec 2 in camp training

Posted: January 17, 2009 in army, rants & ramblings

first week
ok, this is damn boring… the long awaited atec is here. its the “sort of” the final assesment on my redcon 1 unit. 2 weeks. 2 freaking weeks to get this done. and come to think of it, this will be the 7th ICT. meaning to say, im left with 3 more in camps and im done with the army!!

since im a downgraded personel, we’re not supposed to be engaged with streneous exercises. i have no idea, where the label “LOBO” came from, but it’s commonly used to distinguish the not doing anything group of soldiers. i am temporarily downgraded to C2L1 till July 09. This means that i dont have to serve IPPT/RT during these downgrade period.

while the rest of them are busy brushing up their soldiering skills, the Lobos are busy with the cylum straw party. hey we did our part ok! wife texted me to listen to class 95 after 10pm. I managed to listen to Yassminne Cheng reading out the dedication. She pronounced iceywicey as iceywiFey… dumb. i was overly touched by the dedication… thanks darling. it soothed the boredom in camp. the rest of my camp mates were teasing me about it… heh!

come friday, we got to book out! i was too happy to be able to book out. but that night, wife got sick. she was supposed to be admitted to changi hospital to monitor her asthma but she refused to. haiz….

second week
monday morning book in. pre atec speech was pretty influential and spiritual. bla bla bla bla .. i really dowan to story about the out field …… bla bla bla….

i come to a conclusion that this ICT is pretty much meaningless to me. but … but…. behind this damn bodo meaningless ICT, lies some lessons. Some lessons in life which are very useful. I will share with you on my upcoming postings…. promise.

crazy pompuan

Posted: June 18, 2008 in rants & ramblings, Work
Tags: , , ,

it reads:

Pls call me you freakin XXXXXXXXXX

This Lake Chee May is really a piece of shit. Have your “professional” HR did this to you?


Posted: August 23, 2007 in Isk, rants & ramblings, Work
Tags: ,

im actually quite boring. bored with the fact that i have not achieved what i want in my life. but do i exactly know what i want? and what have i done to achieve it? well as of now, im taking things with quite a big leap.

when i joined the workforce, i wanted to earn at least 30k per annum before i turned 30. well based on my low qualification, i cant really expect that much. without papers, without that much experience, there’s quite not much places you can venture. so how would i want to strike it rich? on honest opinion, its pretty tough for me. i’ve seen thru the ranks that one can only be rich with some gamble… with some risk. and thats either through stocks or business. boss aimed that i ought to be an engineer by 2007. and now, im only an AE. subjected for the next level this November… PROVIDED if things goes smooth. thats for work.

religiously, i still blow. knew that i will be sent down there beside bush, in the oven. yelling for help. knowing no one can help. the amount of sins on my left shoulder, my goodness. i think it has to be measured by tons. with more adding on… i need to work something out.

my target age of being a married man was between 28 – 35. I thought i would be when i turned 30. But i’m married when i’m 28.

academically, nothing to be proud about. financially too.

my lecturer from Ass Que Ai once said, “when you want to change, make sure you change the inside you. not the outside you”. it kindda make me wonder a lot sometimes. what can i change myself into? a better person of course. so spot on! lets make the difference…. yeah rite.

moi daye

Posted: August 23, 2007 in Isk, rants & ramblings, Work
Tags: , , , ,

On calibration course these 2 days wit Jas. Rushed my way for the train. Little that i’ve noticed, this is something i’ve missed for about 3 & 1/2 years. The environment, the atmosphere, is rather comical than serious.

Students blabbering about school while they drag their bum a good 1.5km across ave 9. Some rushing adults trying hard not to exceed their time grace from work. Smoking fat lady was infront of me doing her ‘jog’ to the control station. I worry she gets chocked by her cigarette n not to mention, her awesomely tight outfit. Pretty…. Pretty gross. On the platform, there’s this dude really acted cool. Unsure if he realize that his dresscode needs the yelow to make him the traffic light for the train. Heh!

In the train, i started to get bored. My ipod is in my car, so’s my psp. Dammit. And so i create my own game. I picked 5 young, smart looking men, and 5 women in covered shoes. So i have to guess at which station they’ll drop. Stupid … Like duh. Everyone is dropping off @ either orchard, dhoby gawd or the interchange.

The class was splendidly boring! Theorically & Technically. Thank god for the 20 mins break. Had a good puff for break. And a cuppa tasty coffee. Less did I know, that place also cater for students who are taking O,A, dip and degree… they all come down to the main door for a smoke. Now i feel old. Circled by young girls and boys telling blogging with their mouth about the entertainment arena, i felt left out. Evading the situation, i climbed back to the class. Darn the stairs… but nothings will compare the “West Coast Stairs of Doom” and the “833 short stairs to stress”, not to mention the horrid stairs i climbed in Bali for my honeymoon.

The lecturer continued his Calibration formula lesson and before i know it, LUNCH TIME!!!

I had to grab the double cheese. To overcome the cold one I had a few days back. Geez, thank god the double tasted like how it should taste.

Lesson continued after lunch, and only 30 mins into it, my malaysia counterpart called. Thats it. i spent 45 mins on the phone outside class. Trying to align things for the Pee Tee Pee project. When I got back to class, it was already break.. again. Heh! The lecturer commented, my hair became messy after the phone call. He just have to make the whole class turned around and focus on my hair. Oh yeah, my hair after the cut doesnt make much difference. Damn smelly mouthed aunty.

Bla bla bla, it was already 4.30 and the lecturer calls it a day. How nice. I get to go home early. Ok la… not really that nice. But still Ok after all. The MRT journey home was somehow rather nice. It seems that every stop along line carries memory. Jas was all out for a seat. I never minded standing. The perfume from the ladies in the cabin managed to kill the pungent from some sweaty schoolboys.

My walking journey home wasnt that pleasant either. I was on the phone till i reach my void deck with colleagues talking about WORK.

Now here I am .. back home. Bored. Blogging.